This is a transcript of one of the videos in the plain language training course Writing well at work. There are references to slides and visual material that are only available by viewing the video.
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Prefer the active voice over the passive voice
The next technique in writing plainly is to prefer to use the active voice.
Now, just a quick description of the difference between the active voice and the passive voice. The active voice is when I construct a sentence like this -agent, verb, object. So it might be something like ‘Jo kicked the ball’. In the passive voice, I reverse that order – object, verb, agent. Something like ‘the ball was kicked by Jo’.
Now both of these are grammatically correct. It’s not that one’s right and one’s wrong. You could choose to write in either way. Either use the active voice or the passive voice, but I’m going to suggest that we use the active voice most of the time. And let me tell you why.
Firstly, it’s generally shorter. In this really simple example, I’ve increased the word count by 50% when I’ve gone from the active to the passive voice. That’s not helpful.
It does provide information in a natural order. When we are speaking with each other face to face, we tend to use the active voice. It’s good to continue that pattern in our written conversation, to continue to use the active voice.
It also identifies the agent. If I write on the passive voice, ‘the ball was kicked by Jo’, well, Jo could disappear. I just end up with the sentence’ ‘the ball was kicked’ and so I’ve actually lost content. And now my reader might need to manufacture something so that they get the full picture. And because they’re manufacturing something, they may get it right, they may get it wrong. But in any case, there’s some more work for them to do to get the full picture of what’s going on.
The active voice can be more direct and even forceful. And sometimes that’s precisely what we want when we’re writing documents.
The good news is writing in the active voice is pretty easy.
Instead of writing ‘the budget was approved by the board’. Now I’ll start it with the board and I’ll write ‘the board, approve the budget’ in the active voice
Instead of writing ‘a full report of the incident will be prepared by Kate’. Now I’ll write ‘Kate will prepare a full report of the incident’.
Instead of writing, ‘your estimates will be checked by the budget department’, I’m going with the act of right at the beginning of the sentence. ‘The budget department will check your estimates’.
So it is a relatively simple thing to do. It is a matter of being aware of the difference between the active voice and the passive voice and choosing to write with the active most of the time.
Now if you are using Microsoft Word as your writing tool, it has an editor built in. There are times when it will highlight the passive voice for you and suggest an active voice alternative. Just a hint, don’t do everything Microsoft says. But certainly have a look at their suggestions and see if that would be a better way of wording your sentence.
The passive voice is not wrong.
While we prefer to use the active voice, there are times when the passive voice is actually more suitable. Here’s 3 examples where it would be probably better to use the passive voice.
So firstly I might want to make something less hostile. So I’ll write ‘This bill hasn’t been paid’ rather than ‘you haven’t paid the bill’.
Sometimes we need to maintain confidentiality, so I might just write ‘a complaint was made’ rather than specifying who made that complaint.
And sometimes we just don’t know the agent or don’t care. They’re unimportant. And so we’ll write ‘The car was stolen’ rather than ‘someone stole the car’.
So it is about understanding the difference between the active voice and the passive voice and choosing to write with the active most of the time.
Now in the notes that I’ve provided along with this course, you’ll find some notes about using the active voice in scientific writing. If you are working in that type of environment, it would be worthwhile having a read of those couple of pages.
Well, in your booklet of exercises, there’s a couple of sentences I’d like you to have a go at rewriting. And what I’d like you to do is to have a go at rewriting them and put them putting them into the active voice and at the same time, if there’s anything you can do about words, simplifying words or eliminating unnecessary words, do that as well.
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